Every parent has their own set of rules when it comes to raising kids, but for Kentucky-based TikTok creator @itsautumn, the rulebook gets thrown out the window when her child crosses a line. Just recently, Autumn posted a video that has since ignited a fiery online debate about parenting approaches, particularly the question of whether gentle parenting actually holds up in real-life situations or not.
While a chunk of viewers in her comment section feel that gentle parenting is simply too idealistic to be practical, another camp has pushed back hard, standing firmly by the belief that it is the only responsible way to raise a child. So what lit the match? Autumn shared a story about how she ended up spanking her daughter after the little girl threw a fit over a pair of shoes she had been begging to wear and then took a swing at her own mother. Half the internet thinks the child had it coming, the other half disagrees entirely. Pick your side.
TikTok user @itsautumn is telling the tale of whooping her daughter’s tail
Autumn is no stranger to speaking her mind about discipline, and her latest video gave her followers a firsthand look at exactly how she handles a meltdown. She has always been open about her belief in spanking when the situation calls for it, and this particular story gave her plenty of reason to stand behind that view.
In the video, she walks her audience through what went down on a recent school morning. Her daughter had been set on wearing her brand-new black New Balances to school, but Autumn told her to hop in the car with her Crocs on and switch into the sneakers once they arrived. Simple enough, right? Except Autumn was dealing with a broken foot that day and had skipped wearing her medical boot since she figured it would just be a quick drop-off and she would not even need to step out of the car. That plan fell apart fast.
Once they pulled up to the school, Autumn climbed out and headed around to the passenger side to help her daughter swap into those beloved sneakers. But by that point, the excitement had completely fizzled out. The shoes that her daughter had been so desperate to wear were suddenly too uncomfortable, and she flatly refused to put them on. Running low on patience, Autumn told her to put the shoes on, head into school, and promised she would have a brand new pair waiting from Walmart within half an hour. Her six-year-old was having absolutely none of it. The little girl erupted into screaming and thrashing around so wildly that Autumn compared it to watching someone have a seizure, before the child actually swung at her. That was the breaking point. Autumn stepped in, gave her daughter a spanking, and sent her off to school with the words, “Get in that damn school, stop acting like a fool, and have a good day. I love you.” Her daughter responded by shoving her on the way out, which made Autumn briefly reconsider buying the new shoes, though she followed through anyway. Later, when she dropped the shoes off at the school, staff members who had witnessed the earlier scene, including the principal, checked in with her about what had happened. Autumn closed out her video by making it clear that she believes in holding kids accountable, and her daughter’s punishment would include taking on household chores and helping care for her while she heals from her injury.
@itsautumn’s comment section is abuzz with differing opinions about parenting
As expected, no two parents in the comment section saw things exactly the same way, and the responses poured in from every direction. A large portion of viewers rallied behind Autumn, agreeing that spanking has its place in parenting. One commenter, @mrs.young1991, jumped on board immediately, writing that gentle parenting simply does not work. Another user, @sthrnchrm3, expressed genuine relief at seeing a younger parent willing to push back against the gentle parenting movement, calling it a sign of hope.
On the flip side, plenty of viewers took issue with how Autumn handled the moment. User @celtickiwi111 argued that spanking is ineffective and should never happen in a public setting, adding that raising children through fear and humiliation does lasting damage. Another commenter, @whimsyrosette, kept it short and simply called the whole thing strange.
Source : __itsautumn__
How do gentle parents describe gentle parenting?
A research study involving 100 parents from a range of financial and social backgrounds, published through the National Library of Medicine, identified three recurring qualities among parents who considered themselves gentle in their approach.
Managing their own emotional responses, guiding their children through emotional regulation, and showing consistent warmth both physically and emotionally.
Among the 49 parents in the study who identified as gentle parents, nearly 60 percent pointed to keeping their own emotions in check as the cornerstone of their parenting style, specifically avoiding physical punishment or harsh consequences. Just over 40 percent emphasized helping their children work through big feelings by listening, validating, and using those emotional moments as teachable opportunities. Just over a quarter of the group highlighted the importance of consistently expressing love and affection, both through words and physical gestures, as a defining part of how they parent.
